The majority of taming that left a considerable mark on my world, I now attribute to a small number of people. While the bulk of it came from the broader field, once I got my head around it. Or I suppose what I really mean is… it’s now many who leave a mark, but to follow exactly what not to do.
What can I say? Other than things changed, and I started seeing thru another set of eyes. Guess what? Now, everything looked freakin backwards!
So to gain a capacity out of my incapacitation meant that I would have to pull out some serious smarts over the years, or something. The truth is, I see the dead as vibrantly alive these days, and that’s where my undivided attention stands. It’s not with the walking dead or massively divided.
Lastly, as a result of this incredibly unique combination, my attention now faces INWARDS towards the mechanical aspect of Me–Myself–&–I. I heard the dead who kept repeating… ‘Lee, you need to look at yourself closely’. So I did, and it stung because I didn’t like what I had seen. And even though I turned away a few times in the beginning out of my usual fears, denial and pride, etc., I would always come back to listen to what the invisible had to say.
Listening at another level is what led to steady ground.
The Importance of the ‘Walking’ as Well
The Walking, in general, have also significantly helped and without them I would be stuffed. It’s just that… I get frustrated at times as they carry on with things that have very little meaning anymore, and it’s hard work keeping up. No one gave me the time to resolve my issues back then (and they have had plenty of time), so my mind is elsewhere. I have severely deviated from the path.
In fact, I’m reacting quite normally under the circumstances. I got left with no choice but to fortify myself in another reality by compartmentalising my life.