Free-flowing & Distressed Senses of Time
(Positive & Negative Felt Time)
When my mind is clear, or my thoughts are operating within an optimal charge, I exist without the shackles of Time in heavenly homeostasis. However, when my attention is controlled by the strong magnetic presence of pleasure or fear found in the past or future, then I enter into the Free-Flowing or Distressed Sense of Time, respectively. Thus, my Sense of Time itself carries a positive or negative charge equal to that of the thoughts processing in my mind.
On the one end of life, I’m magnificently LOST in the awayness from that dreaded Default/Negative Time that caused significant tension.
Ahh, yeah… I’m in awe again. I’m deep inside Positive Time Territory as my surface thoughts have established a strong connection to my brain’s reward centre. I love floating in the good stuff, having also escaped that annoying reality of longer and harder felt time by putting a problem or two aside.
What can I say? Other than, I’m just having a good time, and that time is flowing freely in this state, without complication or issue. That is until I hold onto it for too long, and the laws of Time and Space take over. In which case…
While on the opposite end of life is the negative charge, and I’m undesirably STUCK to Time. I’m now a very anxious person far away from Positive Time.
Oh crap, I’ve defaulted in the heavy stuff again. I call it the Distressed Sense of Time simply because the past recollections that were once connected to my brain’s fear centre have reconnected back in, sometimes at lightning speed.
For example, I have an upcoming meeting which I’m not looking forward to because of previous encounters, or something pops up in my face that I want to steer clear of because it spells danger. A remembrance of this type or an abrupt confrontation that pulls in many undesirable thoughts immediately causes resistance in my mind. Therefore, I’m experiencing a Distressing Sense of Time.
Regarding the laws of Time & Space, I have worked out that if I hold a positive thought pattern for too long, I experience the crash and burn like you feel after a sugar or caffeine high. In which case, Time flips from Free-Flowing to Distressed because of all the energy expelled in the positive field in an almost manic state. As my sensors overload and I run out of positive energy, suppressed problems begin to stir things up again. The resulting mental fatigue causes time to slow right down, as though it were being squeezed from all sides, unable to flow naturally and freely. This is one of those cases where too much of a good thing can have devastating results.
Consider the pleasure and fear centres as two glands in the brain that work together to maintain a sense of emotional equilibrium. By abusing memory that secretes pleasure (Positive Time), I am also desensitising myself over the long haul while becoming extra sensitive to memory that secretes fear (Negative Time). I’ll hunt for greater experiences that will register fresh pleasures into memory in order to satisfy my constantly changing taste buds.
In terms of the run of fear in the byproduct, I become a less rational person who finds more things that stand in his way. Thus, I get overrun by emotion which ultimately drains my energy, and I can’t see life clearly. This is why I now tread lightly on the pleasure gland and gift myself quality over quantity in a new way of living. Otherwise, I condition myself as an extremist always living between the past and future, the highs and the lows.
In another life, I used to escape my problems all the time which made the ‘Free-Flowing’ (Positive) the Default Time label in my world. But that eventually changed after the laws of nature kicked in to counter my manic condition once and for all. I hit a tipping point and wound up with all sorts of mental problems, which thankfully eased down during a transitional period that followed. Jump to the days of Mindless 2.0 and there is now balance and order in my life as a result of a deeper understanding of Time.
All up, I discovered that if I jump from a dark, cramped space straight over to the light, using a ritual or an escape without fixing the root of my problem, it means I have rerouted my energy into positive sensation and put the negative on hold. This allows the negative energy to incubate and grow, creating an even worse situation for me to face down the road. I’m still a little annoyed at myself for taking this long to learn the lesson.
Back in the day, I would always suppress my negative perception with something pleasantly overriding. Therefore, I perpetuated my own problem in Time.