Front or rear-wheel drive NEITHER mattered in my case. Moving forward, in general, became complicated once I hit an age. So I asked life…
Why the extra challenge? Why, out of the trillions and trillions of star systems, did I end up here with backward cogs? Or the bigger question…
Who the hell dumped me in the middle of a righted-handed infestation? 😤
The Complex Drive
My attention isn’t the easiest thing to satisfy as I’m sure most can understand from after watching themselves. With a variety of forces pulling me here there and everywhere -/+/-/+, I try my best to bring my awareness back; to hold it firm. Or, at least to where I think it should STAY and get the job done! Learn, work, focus, etc.
Then, in the next few moments, there it goes again. OFF, wandering into another forest of thinking as I’m no longer concerned about the track I had planned.
Now I want to drive my reality efficiently and not stumble as I had, nearly my entire life. Yet, I know I won’t achieve this if I keep floating off into various distractions.
Why is the appeal quality fluctuating so rapidly between different things and aspects, like a stubborn habit that will not end or settle down? Because, whenever the lights do turn green for something far less productive (which was all the time), say, towards entertainment or social networking, etc., then all of a sudden my original plan goes straight out the window. In a blink, my efforts transfer as I rationalise the move with some BOGUS excuse to help justify escaping the original plan.
Whatever it was no longer matters; I’m now LIGHT-YEARS away.
But again, it doesn’t stop here.
You see, once I’ve had enough of all one two and three distractions, off I go again. My attention jumps on and on and on, eventually looping me back to the start for the next hopeful run at my elusive task. Which furthermore, is usually when the guilt kicks in from having strayed in the first place.
It’s the story of my life…
I want to go one way, but my mind says: forget that, look over here, instead. While later, it’s followed on with: fool, you shouldn’t have listened to me! Now how are we gonna fix this and get time back?
After many tedious hours trying to work this nonsense out, I discovered that the 3 big players responsible for channelling my attention are Desire, Willpower and Focus. Although they must all be related/connected and branch down hitting somewhere near the roots, which is where I’ll need to uncover.
Next up, is my layout describing the Complex and Simple nature of each I’ve experienced. As a result, I’ve now knocked down and changed my most potent or bad-habits to date.
By clearly seeing the Complex, I freed up space arriving at the Simple.