Escaping Time – the Discreet Force of Ignorance Redirecting My Attention Away From Implied & Compressed Time
When I have something on my mind and turn away, rather than resolve it, I escape time. It’s the one sure thing I hold a degree in, with honours.
As I reach a PSI and the escape begins, I feel a calming sense of relief from what appears as ‘new’ scenery. But really, these are none other than my old thoughts refined to produce the appeal quality again — a threshold drug.
An appropriate set of projections successfully carried a dose of the old influence again (aka my re-dressed/re-painted ideas). I’m happy because the makeover helps me forget my worries, so I let ’em role. I don’t care for the long term; it’s anything that takes the immediate focus off the weight, I now consider, fresh and vibrant.
However, another part of me knows better and always had (but as always, I ignored the signs). Something behind says, Lee, you’re only backlogging and tries to forewarn. Because in the very far end of my mind, an unwanted voice pops up, reminding me that these problems are only, postponed; they will return soon!
But in my typical trancelike ignorance that saved me on every other occasion (or had it, really?), I brush it aside and happily accept the new recycled scene. I allow more and more of these positive thoughts to trickle in, and for as long I possibly can or at least until all value gets spent from the appeal. At which time, there’s a loud knock at the door and reality wants to get paid!
My aim inside this convenient escaped state is to stay avoiding time and forget my worries until life drags me back.
Summing up My Ignorance
Hiding from the clock is a pattern of slowing down my pulse by subtly massaging the negatives in with positive reinforcement, or by compensating one over the other. However, today, I’m also well aware that I cannot hold time off forever because of its polarised nature.